Rain

Singapore becomes a hell hole if it doesnt rain for more than a week, well at least it does if you dont have an air con in your place, which I dont along with the vast majority of the student population here. You try to stay in your room for more than 10 mins and you have beads of sweat pouring down ur face, well maybe i am exagerating it a bit here but then i dont have an obligation to provide an unbiased point of view. But when it rains the room becomes the most blissful place in the universe, the hard plastic mattress feels more inviting than aphrodite's arms and the sirens song lulls u to slumber. It rained yesterday, yesterday was wonderful, it didnt rain today, today was a bad day.

A Night at the Theatre

Last night (no she didnt say that I turn her off) I went to my very first (gasp) play.
I wasnt planning to, I ran into someone who was going, and having nothing better to I decided to tag along. The thing was called "Cat & Mouse" (at the risk of sounding infantile here, I do like Tom and Jerry) and I was thinking it was gonna be some sort of comedy and furthermore it was stated that it was only for audiences 16 and above, so maybe there was some adult stuff in there,lets face it people sex and comedy is really a rather heady brew. So in and I went and for the next 2 hours i was subjected to one of the most pathetic performances that I have ever witnessed, lets put it this way the main source of comedy was my snide comments to my companions about the play. Heres the bloody synopsis -
Drunk girl brings drunk guy home. Drunk girl wants sex, guy states he is celibate and hence no sex that night. Guy remains in girls house, bumming around, girls room mate gets pissed with guy. One night as guy is sleeping the pissed room mate knees guys in the balls and out of the blue they start making love (in case no one has noticed, getting kneed in the balls is rather excruciatingly painful and making love is probably at the top of the "Not Interested" list after you have been kneed in the balls). Girl walks in on them and does nothing.Next day she comes home they argue, girl tells room mate to leave the apartment and the guy is unable to leave the girls apartment.
Even reading it is painful can u imagine that being spread over 2 hours as a play. What the fuck man, theres nothing in here. The bastard who wrote the script wouldnt know a proper script if it crawled up his arse, and made him orgasm thru prostrate stimulation. Whats the worst part? People actually clapped for this travesty.Maybe I should tone down my vitriol, considering the fact that this really was just the first play held by an amateur drama society, but its just that the story really sucked. The acting wasnt all that bad, the stage looked rather classy and the scenes flowed rather seamlessly, but thats all just gloss there has to be a good script, a story. Next time you peaople want to hold a play, how bout performing "Death of a Salesman" by Arthur Miller, now theres a good script. Could have been so much better guys.
Since I have started ranting I guess I will carry on. When I was coming back to Singapore, the bastard at the Malaysian immigration asked me to go to the freaking office as he wanted to ask me questions. There the bastard starts asking me (in malay of course, his knowledge of English would most likely be surpassed by a simian) why do u come so often to malaysia, why do u stay so long here. Patiently (with all humanly possible politeness to boot) I told him that my family resides in Malaysia and I was on holidays so I was staying with them. Then he asks in this really arrogant tone why I am not studying in Malaysia, what the fuck is his problem where the fuck do I fucking study, I mean do I want to waste my time studying in Malaysia's pathetic unis. I replied sarcastically, 'Saya bodoh tuan, saya tak dapat tempat di dalam universiti malaysia yang terbaik did dunia'. Roughly translated that means I am stupid sir, I cannot get a place in malaysian unis which are the best in the world. The spavined son a goat made me wait for more than 20 mins outside the office, before stamping and giving me back my passport. When I came down, my damned bus had left me, and my blasted baggage was on the fucking bus. So I ran halfway around Singapore to get my fucking baggage fucking back. I was screaming along to audioslave, now I am sore of throat, I think I sound sexy when I have a sore throat but my thoughts have never been , lets just say, accurate.

Burial for a Band

You just need to tell us that the world is a vampire you dont need to tell us how the world sucks your blood out, that kinda spoils the effect. One of my most cherished bands, the smashing pumpkins now are officially crap, i saw them on live earth and my god they were awful. They actually managed to spoil "Bullet with Butterfly Wings" i mean for gods sake its one of your most beloved songs at least perform it properly, the vocals were crap (they didnt sound like corgan at all) the guitar playing was awful and the solo was non existent, "today" was pathetic as well. On the bright side the new bassist looked hotter than the previous two, but still who gives a fuck about that, if i wanted chicks i would go look at the pussycat dolls (and turn my volume down to mute too), play my rock properly. It seems their new album is nothing to shout about too, looks like after mellon collie they just died, although everlasting gaze was kinda good. Rest in Peace

Wyrewolves

One night, another one of those sleepless nights, I decided that I needed a jog. Mind you this was about 2 in the morning, but hey this is Singapore right, its got a reputation as a safe place and besides i was only gonna jog around the campus, so I thot nothing about it. I set off full of sound and fury, no wait I didn't do anything like that, i just trudged along. After like halfway through I heard this blood curdling sound, it was the ominous sound of a pack of dogs doing nothing more than sinister than yelping. A pack of dogs yelping at each other might not sound very ominous to you, but let me tell when you are all alone at 2 in the morning and you have an unreasonable fear of dogs like moi then its positively hair raising. This of course brings us to another point, how the hell can NUS let packs of feral dogs roam around the campus, but thats not the story here and the dogs were in my path. Deciding not to take the risk (infinitesimal as it was) of geting bitten I retraced my steps backwards and took a path that i knew would take me to somewhere near pgpr (my hostel), trouble was that I never actually had taken that path. After some time it looked like as I had finally reached pgpr but then like it always happens the bloody place was fenced off, and to make it worse the path led to a pretty dark place and the horror of horrors there was white mist there. I tell you this sort of thing is seriously disconcerting, I steeled myself, repeating to myself "Singapore is a very safe place, nothing happens here" and then this very annoying voice inside of myself kept on saying "singapore has loads of pontianaks " and the other voice was like " there are no bloody things like pontianaks" and other such assorted crap. It turned out that the white mist was emanating from a couple of cooling towers, bloody anticlimaxes. After making my pulse rate shoot up I finally managed to return in one piece, so much for late night excitement. This just came to me, NUS is bloody too green its like as if this they put the uni in the middle of the forest, i once freaking saw a orange black spider the size of a hand in the middle of this huge web and i nearly freaking put my hand in its web, urgggh. Its too green i tell u,l i mean the place supports a pack of wild dogs, huge spiders and other freaks of nature, oh wait thats just the students here, sigh.

Bush, Clinton, Bush, Clinton?

The dynastification of American political life is weakening America's claim to be a democratic beacon. These days political dynasties are usually associated with the young democracies of South Asia rather than mature republics. The dynastification of its political life also points to a deeper problem: the fact that America is producing a quasi-hereditary political elite, cocooned in a world of wealth and privilege and utterly divorced from most people's lives. The rest of the world is gradually moving beyond “idolatry to monarchs” and “servility to aristocratic pride”. Even Britain has expelled most of its aristocrats from the House of Lords. Does America, which led the world in ditching monarchs, hereditary titles and forelock-tugging, really want to be the first country to start going backwards? - unshamedly plaigarised from the Economist

Born Offside

After all that self promotion by the premier league, it finally ended with an Italian team lifting the Champions League trophy, must have been a real heartache for those FA chiefs who were all singing about how the premier league is the worlds finest, should shut them up for a while. So inzaghi scored twice, cyruff said inzaghi cant play football he just happens to be in the right place, ferguson said he was born offside, would have hated it if liverpool had won it, liverpool are probably the most boring team in the world and i dislike them prejudiciously. Now it would be alomost impossible for Kaka not win the european and world player crowns he faces almost no competition, and what a night it was for maldini winning the champions league at 38 and for the fifth time, all with milan. almost perfect

Tooth Ache!!!!

Oh god my bloody teeth are killing. Tried to sleep, laid on the bed for more than an hour, closed my eyes and wished so hard that blissfull sleep will descend upon me, but no, it just cant be that easy can it, hurts so much. After much tossing and turning decided that i wont be able to sleep for quite some time. Tried to do some maths work but cant concentrate. Always thought that dentistry was a freaking dumb profession, know a lil better now. Stop killing me will you.